Farrah has adjusted perfectly...just perfectly. Almost too perfectly if that makes any sense at all. She was such a big girl during the hospital portion of Augusta's birth. She happily left when it was time to go, she packed a tote bag full of her favorite things and told me she would see me later and told her Daddy let's go. She walked all the way to the truck carrying her bag like a big girl, getting a lot of compliments from passerbys, enjoyed "tacos" (breakfast burritos) with Daddy, and headed to the farm for the day. She told her Daddy she missed me and he explained that was totally normal and that he missed me too. She returned and was so excited to see me and to hold her new baby sister once again.
Now that we're home, she absolutely loves to hold her "new baby sister." All throughout the day, she'll ask, "Can I give her another hug and kiss, Mommy?" And she carefully gives her a kiss on the cheek or forehead, and then lays her head onto her chest for a hug. She'll ask to hold her new baby sister or when I offer for her to, she gets giddy with excitement, finds a place to sit, and stretches her arms out for her.
This video of Farrah meeting her new baby sister for the very first time is literally a tear-jerker for me. It makes me feel ashamed of my fears and worries. It makes me so damn proud of Farrah. It makes me see firsthand what true and unconditional love is.
She literally adores her new baby sister. She oftentimes asks if she can go check on her new baby sister. She'll laugh when Augusta's leg is stretched out funny and ask if she can put it back for me. Farrah will uncover Augusta's arm and she'll look at me and say, "I uncovered her arm for you, Mommy."
Farrah has been watching Caillou a lot lately, and Caillou says "Mommy" all the time when he is talking to his mother, so Farrah has been doing it too and my heart just loves and cherishes it.
Farrah held Augusta for probably 10 minutes and then said, "I'm tired, Mommy. I want you to take her out of my arms now. Can I give her a hug and kiss, Mommy?"
Baby blues keep popping in from time to time. I'm hopeful it's just this first week of hormones adjusting back to normal. I have to almost not think about some things that touch my heart so deeply, like the way my baby girl turned into a big girl and a big sister and holds nothing back. And holds absolutely nothing against me or Augusta for any of it. She just jumped right in to big sister status, something I can't even relate to. I'm so proud of her that it hurts me.
As I am sitting here on my bed right now while both girls are taking a nap with Grey's Anatomy paused on the TV, Farrah's door opened and I heard her go pee in her little potty. I expected her to come find me, but instead I heard her door shut again. I can't hardly handle her growing up on me like this. I went in to check on her and she was laying back down in bed covering herself up to go back to sleep. She asked, "Where were you, Mommy?" I told her in my bed. "Feeding Augusta?" I told her that she is sleeping too. "When she wakes up from her nap, can I hug her and kiss her and hold her, Mommy?" I told her that she can. "Thank you, Mommy," she says. I patted her butt and she fell right back to sleep. I think my heart may burst from all the love and happy feelings I have rapidly growing inside me.
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